Life in Room 11

This is a story of a week and a day
And some of the things that I observed along the way
I am a young fellow just 73
You wouldn’t believe what happened to me.

I went for an angiogram which wasn’t very smart
Because they found that there was something wrong with my heart
But it’s no problem it can be fixed really fast
With something that sounded like the Huntley bypass

I arrived for my op and was sent to have my blood taken
And I’m thinking to myself surely they are mistaken
Get my blood taken that can’t really be true
Cause then my heart would have nothing to do

I must have looked scruffy on my very first day
Because the nurse said I needed a shave before I was taken away
I think I must have been a very first case
Cause I was shaved all over except on my face

My chest, arms legs now heading out here
And I no longer looked like Paddington bear
But I plucked Chuck which was really no fun
It will be ages before I’m allowed in the sun

During the operation I play an important part
Something to do with providing a hard
This is my phone while others are trained
If I don’t get it right I’ll have to do it again

I must confess and tell only you
I fell asleep on the job, believe me it’s true
But I got away with it, I don’t think that they noticed
Probably because on their own jobs they were focused

They were all happy with the way that it went
But I would have preferred to just have a stent
While I’m lying there they wheel me away
I can’t remember the rest of the day

Next morning I woke up in intensive care
I must have been naughty to end up in there
If I am good I might get back to my room
I tried really hard and was back there by noon

I have wires fixed to my skin and my heart
And someone has shoved a pipe up a very private part
Now the wires lead to the boxes, all nice and neat
I think it measures how much food that I eat

Read on…